I had to travel to California, kind of last minute, for the first time with my job. After running through all the scenarios in my head in regards with what to do with my daughter, I decided to take her along for the trip. She’s 17 and able to stay on her own, but my older son was on a mission trip that week and I didn’t have warm fuzzies about her being alone for 4 days while I was gone. The fact that she was begging to go may have had some sway in my decision.
Going to California in early February to get away from cold and snow, was really a no-brainer, and the fact that the extra plane ticket for her was actually cheaper than expected helped! I reminded her that this was a work trip for me and that was the priority. She agreed and I quickly made the arrangements.
Expectations Set
We were supposed to arrive at LAX at 4:30pm on Tuesday evening, pick up a rental car and then drive along the coast to see the beach, stick our toes in the sand and then head to our hotel in Calabasas. My daughter wanted to see the sunset, ideally on the beach, and I told her we should have time to see that after getting the rental car and before the sun went down.
Well, I did not factor in several things that messed with our plan. First of all, we were not intending to check our bags. But the plane was full, and last minute we had to surrender our carry ons while boarding. This meant a delay as we waited at the carousel for our bags to come. Fortunately, they were some of the first ones out. But as we transitioned to find the shuttle to the car rental place, I noticed the sun was starting to go down.
The shuttle took us to the car rental place which wasn’t very far, but took some time because of the traffic. After we arrived, there was another delay as I went to the wrong building and waited in the wrong line. After picking out our car in the lot and loading our bags, we started out! But just into rush hour traffic. And with only a hint of color left in the sky. We had missed the sunset.
Expectations Failed
I still drove along the beach to Malibu Pier as that was my original plan. I was trying to dodge cars and not freak out from the motorcycles speeding between the slower moving lanes. We finally reach Malibu Pier at about 6:45. It was quite dark at this time. We could hear the waves hit the beach, but couldn’t even find a way to get down to the beach to stick our toes in.
Exhausted from the long day, I promised we would come back and be able to spend the whole morning at the beach on Friday before we flew out. I had been told to plan on working all day Wednesday and Thursday, so I planned a later flight on Friday to be able to go to the beach that morning before heading home.
So, we drove another hour through what I imagined to be a beautiful area with hills all around. But we couldn’t see anything in the dark. We went to find some dinner, hit the grocery store and then went to bed, a little bummed we hadn’t really seen anything of California.
I had a 10 minute drive in the beautiful sunshine to the office the next morning and got to see a little bit of the terrain. Very different than at home and very green! My daughter’s plan while I was at the office all day was to hang out by the pool and enjoy the hot tub and work out room. She got to enjoy a view of 3 palm trees and a slender sliver of sun over the pool area before it totally disappeared at mid-day (a little different than the photo on the website) and then wasn’t feeling well, so went back to our room. I drove home late in the dark. We drove to get dinner in the dark, ate and went back to the hotel and to bed.
From Bad to Worse
Repeat on Thursday, same limited view for both of us during the day and driving back in the dark. And then I got some bad news. My work had gone longer than expected and I would need to go with the site manager to IKEA in Burbank on Friday morning.
NOOO! Our long-awaited beach time totally disappeared! I reminded my daughter (and myself) that it was a business trip and work was the priority, but we were both extremely disappointed.
Friday morning arrived, and at least we saw more of California during the hour long trip to Burbank. We were at IKEA when it opened and were done by 11:15 so we headed toward LAX to make sure we got there before our 3:55 flight as traffic was horrendous. We made a few stops at a park and snapped some pics with palm trees.
We had a little extra time, but not enough to get to the beach and back. So the most anticipated part of the trip was not to be. We did see the beach from our plane windows on take-off, however, so that was a cool perspective. My soul and toes missed the sand and surf, but my eyes got a treat.
Was it worth it?
The trip for my daughter was a FAIL: while she got to go to California, she saw most of it in the dark and didn’t get to experience the beach to make up for the extra work of missed days from school.
For me, I got what I needed workwise and to take a trip with my daughter. But I also missed some therapeutic beach time that would have made up for the exhaustingly long days and missing my regular self-care routine at home.
Isn’t this trip like a little bit like life? We have expectations of what we want to have, what we want to do, and where we want to go. And sometimes it just doesn’t work out–everything goes wrong and we don’t get what we want. Stuff just happens. I’m reminded of the book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Some days are just like that, even in Australia!
Henry, our dog, was the only one that had fun on our trip! I boarded him and he got to play with other dogs all day, every day, while we were gone.
Perspective to see the good
It’s tempting to grumble and complain when things go wrong, until you realize it doesn’t help anything. It doesn’t even make you feel better! After we got back home and I rested up, I was able to get over the saltiness of unfulfilled expectations. Looking on the bright side, I got to fly over the mountains for the first time in my life. It’s also the first time I got to fly out over the ocean–and I didn’t have to pay for it! My daughter got more experience navigating through airports with me so she’ll be better prepared for her solo trip to Atlanta during Spring Break to visit her sister. We also had some really good conversations on the trip, being together and out of our usual routine. This experience made me thankful for other trips that went without hitch.
How about you? With some time and perspective, are you able to see some good when things don’t go your way? Are you able to see it as an exercise in growing your patience and your character? God can do some amazing things in us when life is difficult and doesn’t go the way we planned. If you’re having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, realize God can grow perseverance, strength and wisdom from it if you let him. Trust him! He’s holding you close, no matter what your days look like.
Praying for you today, Lovely one!
